The Right Time is Right Now
Even before I published Ten Days With Dad, the idea of going to graduate school for a master's degree was something I had thought about often. After Fairfield, the plan was to get a master's in public policy. When I left Washington, DC and started my fundraising career, I leaned toward an MBA. But ultimately, what made the most sense all along was a master's in creative writing (often called a master's in fine arts).
That journey began last night when I started my first course, Advanced Fiction: Writing the Short Story. It might take four years to finish my degree, but I'm determined to make it happen. The hard part—starting—is done.
It wasn't fear or finances that held me back—it was timing. Not so much "I don't have the time," but more like "Is this the right time in the grand scheme of my life?"
Here's what I would argue: We often use the concept of timing as an excuse. "Now's not the right time to quit my job," or "get out of this relationship."
I've been there. (To be clear, I'm talking about quitting a job, not getting out of my relationship with Coleen!)
But when is the right time to do something? And why do we wait so long to make a change?
Fear of failure and financial considerations are normally at the top of the list. I think we all understand the logic of both circumstances, but if we're honest with ourselves, neither is a good enough reason to avoid acting. I'm not trying to be harsh or provocative here. Being afraid to fail is powerful. It's normal. And worrying about money and paying the bills? That's legitimate too.
But again, I ask: When is the right time to make a change or take action to improve our situation?
Right now.
The Golden Handcuffs Are Real
There's research and psychology behind this call to action. The financial fear that keeps people stuck in jobs has been extensively studied. The concept of "golden handcuffs" was first coined in 1976, when employers offered economic incentives and benefits to encourage highly compensated employees to stay at a company, even when they were unhappy.
But here's what the research reveals about why staying "for the money" often backfires:
Golden handcuffs create what researchers call a "comfort trap"—you're comfortable enough not to leave, but not fulfilled enough to thrive. People who delay career changes for purely financial reasons often experience decreased long-term earning potential, increased stress and burnout from staying in a misaligned work environment, and the opportunity cost of missing the compounding benefits of starting earlier in a field (substitute company or position) they're passionate about.
The research suggests that the "perfect time" to make a career change rarely arrives. Those who make strategic moves earlier often achieve better outcomes because they have more time to build expertise in their new field, can take calculated risks before major financial commitments accumulate, and avoid the psychological trap of lifestyle inflation.
The Real Cost of Waiting
The golden handcuffs phenomenon is a complex interplay of financial security, social expectations, and personal comfort. But staying purely for financial reasons often costs more in the long run than the temporary financial discomfort of a strategic career move.
I think about all the "somedays" I've collected over the years. Someday I'll write that novel. Someday I'll start that business. Someday I'll go back to school. The truth is, someday has a way of never showing up on the calendar.
Starting my master’s program wasn't about finding the perfect time—it was about recognizing that the right time is almost always right now. Yes, it means juggling more. Yes, it means financial sacrifice. Yes, it means being uncomfortable for a while.
But here's what I believe to be true: the discomfort of growth is always preferable to the slow suffocation of staying stuck, trapped, manipulated, or abused.
Your Move
So what's your "someday"? What change have you been putting off because the timing isn't perfect? What golden handcuffs are keeping you comfortable but not fulfilled?
The research is clear, but more importantly, your gut probably is too. The right time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second-best time is now.
The question isn't whether you can afford to make the change. The question is whether you can afford not to.
See you next week.
