Firsts: The Moments That Shape Us
This past weekend was full of firsts. Sean competed in his first collegiate golf tournament in Williamstown, MA, and Coleen and I stayed in our first “motel.” It’s funny how these "firsts" shape who we are and give us a chance to grow—whether navigating the nerves of competition or adapting to something as simple as where we stay.
Now, I know for sure Sean's tournament was a huge milestone. It was incredible to be there and watch him play at Taconic Country Club, one of the top college courses in the country. The course was challenging, and with 20 teams and 100 golfers, the competition was fierce. Sean didn’t have his best round on day one, but he rebounded like a champ on day two. He posted the lowest score for his team and finished in the top 20% for the round. It was a proud parent moment and, indeed, a memory that will stick with him—and us—for years to come.
Coleen and I were equally impressed by his teammates, coaches, and the other parents who were there. We’re already looking forward to next weekend’s tournament and fine-tuning our tailgate game. With Parents Weekend at Bates coming up, we’ll have a bigger crowd, so we’re upping our setup. The new cooler is on order, and we’ll be ready to roll.
As for the motel, well, that was a first for Coleen! We stayed at the Berkshire Valley Inn in Hancock, MA. I should have paid more attention to the reviewer who said: "The owners are great. It’s like staying in Schitt’s Creek. It’s worn down but with all the sweet details that add warmth and charm." While Coleen loved the show Schitt's Creek, staying in a place like that? Not exactly her first choice. The BVI was much nicer than the sitcom motel, and I wouldn’t hesitate to recommend the property. Pamela, the owner, was gracious and welcoming, going out of her way to ensure we were happy. Even if it wasn’t Coleen’s ideal version of "cozy," the bed was comfortable, and the room was clean. Besides, after spending so much time walking the golf course, we were exhausted when we returned to our room!
Firsts Are Milestones for Personal Growth
First times—whether it’s playing in your first college tournament, starting a new job, your first real crisis, or even your first kiss—are defining moments in our lives. These "firsts" become memories but also set the stage for everything that follows. They remind us of the excitement, the nerves, and the thrill of stepping into the unknown.
Think about your own firsts. They’re more than just moments on a timeline. They teach us how to face new challenges, adapt, and grow. Sean’s first tournament may be the first of many, but it’s a benchmark for what comes next in his college golf career. It’s an experience he’ll carry with him—the nervousness of that first tee shot, the joy of playing better on day two, the pride of leading his team.
How Firsts and Mistakes Help You Grow
As we go through life, we rack up experiences, memories, and stories. But the funny thing is, even with all that experience, we still find ourselves making mistakes along the way. You’d think after decades of learning, our missteps would become fewer and farther between. Yet, they keep happening—and that's perfectly okay.
I’ve been working in the branded merchandise business for more than 30 years, and yet I’m still learning something new every week. And by learning, I mean making mistakes. You’d think after this much time in the industry, I’d have everything down to a science, but the truth is, mistakes don’t stop as we get older or more experienced. They just change shape.
And honestly, that’s part of the journey. Mistakes, whether they come with your "firsts" or somewhere along the way, will always keep coming. It’s how we deal with them that truly matters. Mistakes are growth in disguise. They may not feel great in the moment, but they offer us a chance to reflect, learn, and adapt. Last week, I wrote about how setbacks are often just redirections—and mistakes work in much the same way. Failure is feedback. Every mistake allows us to improve, but we can only do that if we take a moment to learn from it without overanalyzing or dwelling on it.
Looking at Sean’s first month of college, he’ll face his share of bumps—whether it’s his first graded paper, his first tournament, or simply adjusting to life away from home. The key lesson is that bumps are inevitable. I was proud to watch him overcome his rough first day in the tournament and return stronger on day two. That’s a life lesson in itself: setbacks don’t define you; how you respond does.
Personally, this past month has been a lesson in handling mistakes. I can’t remember a month with as many issues as this one. Most of the problems were out of my control, but I was responsible for the outcome at the end of the day. It’s been humbling, to say the least, but it’s also a reminder to practice what I preach. I’ve had to go back and reread some of my advice on resilience, growth, and redirection to help me push through this tough patch.
Final Thoughts: Embracing Firsts, Bumps, and Lessons Learned
Firsts are unforgettable, whether they’re moments of triumph or lessons learned through mistakes. They shape who we are and set the tone for what’s to come. The same is true of our missteps. They may never stop, but that’s okay—they’re part of our lifelong journey of growth and improvement.
So, here’s to the firsts, the bumps, and the lessons we learn along the way.
See you next week.